Life without a ring...

...is absurd. Really. I got hit on TWICE last week. And that doesn't usually happen, so I'm guessing the absence of the usual tell-tale sign of being taken is what's to blame. And it's an awful feeling, really. Here's two reasons why:

1) I don't want to give anyone the wrong impression, so instead of just interacting like a normal person would, I become a social retard and the situation becomes painfully awkward. Luckily, I've had a girlfriend with me both times who was able to rescue me from my idiot self.

2) Even if I wanted to play along and flirt a bit for kicks, I have no idea how. Aside from the standard catcalls Pasadena is known for, I'm not used to being approached or observed by strange men. When I was recounting this lack of flirting muscle to my good friend last night, she replied, "Well of course, you've been married since you were like thirteen!" Touche, Katie, touche. :)

So, Ben and I have devised a plan for the situation in case it presents itself again. We will have some previously agreed upon signal which he will interpret as, "Help me, help me, help me!" (He was in the room for Disaster Encounter #1 and took no heed of my nonverbal signals because he thought I was talking to some fellow Fuller guys). When I provide said signal, he will step up, interrupting whatever semblance of conversation is occurring and drop some lame line like, "If I told you that you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me." And I will respond with enthusiasm, jumping out the seat and grabbing his arm. Then we'll walk off together. Ben pointed out that it would suck if we wanted to stay, because that scene would call for us to actually leave the party/bar/restaurant, but I told him, "Heck no! How much funnier would it be if we just relocated to another corner of the room?!"

In the meanwhile, we're going to go ring shopping - not for another diamond, mind you, because I'm fully confident we'll come across it eventually, but for some quality piece that I'll continue wearing once the ring has been found. I'm thinking about another birthstone ring, a sapphire. Then I'll look cool because it will seem like I took Blood Diamond to heart and am protesting diamonds. And, as a White Person (http://wallyjack.blogspot.com/2008/02/ouch.html), I want to look cool like that.